Alors On Danse
by CassetteTapes
Summary: Or, 5 times people watched them dance and 1 time they didn't. I know these are usually uploaded as a oneshot but it turned into a 10,000 word fic so I'm uploading it as a chapter fiction. Candy pairing Cate Sandra
1. Part 1

The first time it happened, Sandra wasn't even sure it could be counted as dancing. More accurately she would describe it as mindless theatrics, but she would call it dancing for the sake of it all. They'd been walking back to set after shooting the fashion show scene where Rose Weil made her first appearance. They'd met Helena Bonham Carter a few days prior to filming and they all agreed she lived up to her reputation. She and Anne had bonded almost instantly, showing each other pictures of cute dogs between takes.

They'd retreated to Anne's trailer to run lines shortly after that day's filming had come to an end, leaving Cate and Sandra to walk back to set alone. They'd started off by chatting about their newest addition to the cast, but slowly the conversation had dwindled into cheerful silence. About ten minutes later, the blonde began to subconsciously hum under her breath.

Sandra didn't realize what it was she was humming until the unmistakable chorus of 'Mamma Mia' reached her ears. A smile split across Sandra's face as she continued to stare at Cate, who still hadn't looked up. This wasn't the first time for Cate to drift off into her own little world around Sandra. Some people would think it to be insulting, like Cate didn't care, but Sandra knew that wasn't the case. She liked to submerge in her own mind sometimes, just tune out the rest of the world...and honestly who could blame her?

She didn't realize how long she'd been staring until blue eyes peered up at her under hooded lashes. Heat crept up her neck and she smiled sheepishly, "Sorry."

"Don't apologize, I don't always realize when I'm doing that."

It took a moment for Sandra to understand what Cate was talking about, "Oh! No, I don't mind, I always appreciate some good ABBA."

Smiling, she turned her gaze away from Sandra, "I think it's all that talk of there being a Mamma Mia Two."

"I really enjoyed that movie, and like I said, I'm always up for some ABBA."

"What's your favorite?"

Taking a moment to think she shrugged, "To be honest, Mamma Mia. I love Super Trouper too, what about you?"

"Lay All Your Love On Me, but Mamma Mia is right up there too."

"I've been cheated by you since I don't know when, so I made up my mind it must come to an end." Sandra sung softly.

Raising an eyebrow Cate joined in, "Look at me now, will I ever learn? I don't know how, but I suddenly loose control, there's a fire within my soul."

A little louder now, "Just one look and I can hear a bell ring, one more look and I forget everything woah."

"Mamma Mia, here I go again, my, my, how can I resist you?" Cate grabbed Sandra's hand.

Giggling she kept going, "Mamma Mia, does it show again? My, my, just how much I missed you?"

Dramatically stepping away from Sandra, while still holding tightly to her hand she exclaimed, "Yes! I've been brokenhearted! Blue! Since the day we parted!"

"Why? Why? Did I ever let you go?"

"Mamma Mia, now I really know. My, my, I could never let you go." Cate smiled at her, Sandra smiled back assuming they had come to an end but Cate dove into the next verse, "I've been angry and sad about things that you do."

"I can't count all the times that I told you we're through."

"And where do you go, when you slam the door, I think you know that you want me away too long. You know that I'm not that strong." Cate dramatically put a hand on her forehead.

"Just one look and I can hear a bell ring, one more look and I forget everything."

Together this time, "Woah!"

"Mamma Mia, here I go again, my, my, how can I resist you? Mamma Mia, does it show again? My, my, just how much I missed you?" They sung together, Sandra spinning Cate under her arm as they went.

"Yes! I've been broken hearted!" Cate sang.

"Blue! Since the day we parted!" Sandra let go of Cate's hand as they maneuvered a lamppost.

"Why? Why? Did I ever let you go?" She shrugged.

"Mamma Mia, even if I say, my, my, heed me now or never." Sandra grabbed Cate's hand again, almost relieved to feel how warm her hand was.

"Mamma Mia, it's a game we play, my, my, doesn't mean forever."

"Mamma Mia, here I go again, my, my, how can I resist you?"

"Mamma Mia, does it show again my, my, just how much I missed you?" They were basically skipping down the sidewalk now, and if anyone saw them heaven only knows what they were thinking.

"Why, why? Did I ever let you go?"

"Mamma Mia, know I really know, my, my, I could never let you go!" Cate twirled herself into Sandra's arms and they broke into hysterical laughter.

Sandra grinned down at her, nose and cheeks rosy from the crisp November evening, their bodies still pressed together. "Who knew you were such a good singer?" Cate admitted, accent thick from being out of breath.

"Me? No way, you were the real star of that performance."

Laughter filled the air, and Sandra reluctantly let go of Cate as they began walking again, the set now in sight. Despite the chilly air, Cate's stomach was filled with warmth, making her face hurt from smiling.


	2. Part 2

The second time it happened the rest of the cast had sent Cate and Sandra to get groceries. Well actually, Cate had lost in rock, paper, scissors, and instead of accepting her fate, insisted that Sandra come with her. Not that she had tried to resist, simply let the blonde drag her out of the makeshift lounge area and to her car. The entire way she chattered on about how it was always her that got thrown out on grocery duty simply because she could never decide whether she was going to play rock, paper, or scissors and panicked at the last minute. "Well it's not my fault you don't know how to play rock, paper, sciscors, I don't know why I'm subjected to this too." Sandra commented as they reached the car.

"Someone has to suffer with me, and I like you the best so..." Cate shrugged, rumaging through her purse for the keys.

"Oh, you like me the best so you make me suffer? Makes perfect sense." She rolled her eyes, opening the door and sliding into the passenger seat.

"Glad you understand darling." Cate ducked into her own seat and winked before starting the engine.

Against her will a smile broke across the brunettes' features. They turned onto the freeway, thankful to have just missed rush hour. After about ten minutes Sandra spoke up, "Where are we headed?"

"Probably Whole Foods, Anne needs organic food and I prefer it. The other don't really care but I don't want to go two places if we don't have to."

"Sounds good to me." She paused for a moment, "Did you know Amazon bought Whole Foods?"

"Mhm," She hummed in response, "They really are taking over."

"No kidding." She leaned back in her seat, "A little scary isn't it?"

"Yeah kinda. Everything's a bit scary right now Sandy."

"I know it is." She turned her head to look at the woman next to her, "It'll be okay."

Cate's gaze hadn't left the road so she didn't notice Sandra moving beside her. It was only when a warm hand curled around the one on her thigh did she look over. Brown eyes shone in the evening light, and had Cate not been one of the largest freeway's in America she might have never looked away. But as it was, her eyes refocused on the road as she squeezed Sandra's hand tightly, "I know."

The rest of the drive was spent in contented silence, Sandra's thumb stroking the back of Cate's hand. Before long, they were pulling into the shopping center parking lot. Reluctantly their hands parted as they climbed out of the vehicle and Cate retrieved the reusable totes her children had made for her. When they were inside the store she had the urge to reach for Sandra's hand again but swallowed it and pulled out the list the cast had written for them.

"First stop is produce." She announced, grabbing a cart and steering it towards the fresh food.

Falling in stride beside the Australian, she peered over at the list, the actresses had created columns with their names at the top and below a list of what they needed. "How exactly are we going to sort out what is for who?"

"I have a designated bag for everyone." She responded, placing a bag of kale into the bag with a giant purple flower painted on it, "This one is Mindy's. Pirate ship is Nora's, handprint peacock is for Helena, pink and purple replication of 'Starry Night' is for Rihanna, so on so forth."

"Wait, wait, we're shopping for Rihanna?!"

"No we're just going to let her starve." She joked, "Yes of course we're shopping for Rihanna."

"Doesn't she have like a...personal shopper or something?"

Cate raised an eyebrow, "Yeah. That would be me."

They both laughed, "Your kids are quite the artists."

"Indeed." She agreed, bagging some Gala Apples.

They continued throughout the produce section like this, chatting lazily and checking things off the list. Neither Sandra nor Cate had made a list of their own considering they were doing the shopping, so both grabbed whatever looked good. Cate watched as Sandra filled her own bag, a green and blue ocean (no pun intended) with various greens and berries...she was going through some kind of weird smoothie faze. She looked good like this Cate mused, jeans, black flats, hair up in a braid to ensure waves the next day and long grey trench coat. She looked calm, and happy.

"Hello? Earth to Blanchett." The other actress said in a sing-song voice.

Shaking her head she blinked a few times, "Hmm? What?"

"I said, we're done in produce."

"Oh. Right." She looked down at the list, "Next stop, coffee."

"Yeet."

"D..did you just say yeet?" She asked incredulously.

"Yes?" Sandra shrugged, "Nora keeps saying it whenever she beats Mindy at Mario Kart. I figured it was the newfangled word for 'awesome' or something."

"The fact that you just said 'newfangled' proves that you should not be saying yeet." Cate said, pushing the cart towards the coffee aisle.

"What does it even mean?"

"Oh I have no clue, Roman keeps saying it when he texts me."

"Too much internet if you ask me."

"You got that right, I tried to be cool and reference a même, but apparently it's not the French pronunciation."

Sandra broke into uncontrollable laughter, covering her strawberry lips with her hand to not draw attention to them. "Who did you say it to?" She managed.

"Helena." Cate sighed, "Who kindly informed me that it was memes." She said, drawing out the e's for effect.

"Même." She snorted.

"Alright, you can stop your cackling now." Cate scolded, hitting her co-star on the arm.

She gripped Cate's forearm to steady herself, but it did nothing to dim the grin on her face. Cate ducked her head to stop the contagious smile from spreading onto her own face. They'd arrived at the coffee section anyway, Sandra selected a 'Starbucks Signature Blend' and gathered the requested blends from the rest of the cast while Cate ground them.

"Which one do you want?" The brunette inquired, as she handed over another bag of beans.

"Uh, French Roast will be fine."

"Alright." Sandy handed her the bag and they finished up.

"Last but not least we have to get snacks."

"My favorite aisle." Cate grinned.

"Cate." Sandra gave the blonde a mock warning look, "I thought you were on a diet."

"Not anymore!" She giggled, abruptly veering the cart down the aisle haphazardly, leaving Sandra to scramble to catch up.

"Cate!" She squealed, "You have to be good! Smoothies!" She rushed after the actress who was recklessly steering the cart across the store in search of the snacks. When she finally caught up to the Aussie, she found her studying the crackers, a box already in her hand.

"Cate." She groaned, "You can't."

Blue eyes turned to look at her and faded lips turned down in a pout, "But crackers Sandy."

"Cate..." She began again.

"Please."

She sighed and threw her hands up in surrender, "Fine, I'm sure we can put humus and cucumbers on them or something. You just can't binge eat them. No binge eating." She said, subconsciously using her Mother voice.

"Yeah, yeah, no binge eating, I get it." The actress agreed, tossing the crackers into the shopping basket.

There was a silly grin on Cate's and Sandra felt her insides warm at the sight of it. Just then the radio, which had been playing in the background switched to the hit 'Shake It Off' by Taylor Swift. No, it wasn't the greatest song she'd ever heard but every time came on in the car, Sandra found herself swaying to the beat. Apparently she wasn't the only one, because when she looked over at Cate, she was bouncing her shoulders slightly.

A laugh escaped Sandra's mouth as she exclaimed, "What are you doing?"

"Shaking it off." Cate responded, brushing imaginary dust off her shoulders to emphasize.

Deciding to play along she raised an eyebrow in Cate's direction, according to the lyrics, 'I go on too many dates.'

'But I can't make 'em stay.' She wagged a finger, joining in.

'At least that's what people say, that's what people say.' They both mouthed the lyrics.

'But I keep cruising, can't stop won't stop moving.' Cate mocked driving a car and began to sway her hips.

'It's like I got this music, in my mind, saying it's gonna be alright! 'Cause the players gonna play, play, play, play, play, and the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, baby I'm just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake, shake it off, shake it off!' They both broke into obnoxious dance moves, varying from something that looked like a Hawaiian wave to the sprinkler.

Until suddenly some poor unsuspecting woman passed by the aisle and nearly ran into the display of sodas when she saw the two of them. Instantly Cate as doubling over in laughter, head coming to rest on Sandra's chest, which was shaking with laughter. After a few seconds she lifted her head, still snickering, "Oh my God." She breathed, "The poor woman."

"Just minding her own business to come across two middle-aged women dancing to T-swizzle."

"T-swizzle." Cate snorted, keeling over in another round of muffled laughs.

Sandra held Cate close as she tried to regain her sanity, but the brunette kept giggling into Cate's soft blonde hair. "Shhh." She whispered, laughter still bubbling up.

"Sorry, sorry." Was the breathy response, as the Aussie pulled away gently.

Sandra's breath completely left her body as she looked upon her co-star, her cheeks were rosy and she was beaming. She was suddenly struck with awe at how blessed she was to have met this gorgeous, talented woman. Her smile spread from cheek to cheek and she was about to speak when the bored sounding cashier announced that the store would be closing in ten minutes.

"We better get the rest of the stuff and get going." Cate said.

"Yeah." Sandra agreed, still smiling.

After they'd selected the remaining items for the cast and checked out, they were both surprised to find that the sun was nearly set when they left the store. Cate loaded the bags into her trunk and turned to Sandra, who was sipping a decaf tea she'd bought on the way out. "Thanks for coming with me."

"Well, I mean...you didn't really give me a choice." She took a sip of her tea, "But if you had, I would have come anyway." She smiled slyly, "And that's the tea sister." She said, snapping her fingers. Both women began laughing again as they climbed back into the car, and nearly every time Cate went shopping after that Sandra willingly accompanied her.


	3. Part 3

The next time it happened was Anne's fault. They were all supposed to practice for a waltz scene at the MET. Sandra was supposed to practice with Anne, but at the last minute she had alerted her via text that she wasn't going to be on set that day. Now Sandra was left without a partner and no idea how to execute the scene they were shooting the next day.

Neither Sarah nor Mindy were in the scene so she couldn't ask them, Helena wasn't in today either, and Nora kept stepping on her toes when she'd tried with her. That left one person...Cate. If she was being honest with herself she didn't know why she hadn't gone to Cate in the first place. She knew for a fact the Australian was a patient teacher, and had been in a few ballroom dancing scenes prior to this.

Sandra set out to find the blonde, meandering around the set until she found Cate lounging on a couch, her phone held above her head. She turned to smile at Sandra as she entered the room, "Hey, where've you been? I haven't seen you all day."

"I've been trying to find someone to help me learn tomorrow's scene."

"You mean the dancing one?"

"Yeah."

"I thought Anne was supposed to help you with that." Cate said, glancing back at her phone briefly before turning it off and setting it aside.

"She's not here today, something about her baby I think."

"Ah, well then I assume you're here for my help?" Cate sat up to face Sandra.

"Yeah...if it's not too much trouble."

"Of course not! I'm not doing anything until four anyway."

Looking at her watch she nodded, "That gives us about an hour."

"Should be plenty of time." She smiled, jumping up from the couch.

"So uh...I should warn you I'm not very good at uh, the whole dancing thing." She admitted sheepishly.

"Oh pish posh, no one is until they have the right teacher."

"Oh? And you're suggesting that will be yourself?"

"Obviously, many consider me to be the master." Cate insisted.

"Uhhuh." Sandra rolled her eyes, "Here, I have the music."

"Better to practice without it first." She said, halting the other woman's actions.

"Oh, alright, um...how should we?"

Cate wasted no time placing one hand on Sandra's shoulder and the other clasping her hand. "Now you put your hand on my shoulder." She said.

Following her instructions, Sandra looked up expectantly.

"There, now it's just the box step." Cate instructed.

"Okay." She nodded, looking down at their feet before taking a dainty step backwards, watching Cate's feet follow. Left, up, right, down, she watched their feet, intent on not stumbling. Left, up, right, down, left, up, right, down, a grin spread across her face, "Hey, this isn't too hard."

"Right? Okay, ready for the next part?"

"Yeah."

"Now all we have to do is move in a circle while doing the box step."

Without ever lifting her eyes from their feet she began to do as Cate said, slowly moving them in a circle around the room. If she weren't so concentrated on her own movement she might've taken time to marvel at how Cate made it look much more graceful, even though they were doing the exact same thing. After they'd made it around the room twice Sandra asked without looking up, "Now what?"

"Now twirl me under your arm."

"Oh, uh okay." She smiled nervously before looking up at Cate, who was watching her, eyes twinkling. That of course, only made Sandra's heart beat faster. Thinking back on their dancing in the street a few weeks prior, she twirled Cate under her arm, their hands coming to rest atop each other afterwards.

"Funny enough, that's exactly where your hand should be." Cate smiled encouragingly, "Now we just do the box step again, before returning the the original position."

"That's it?" Sandra asked.

"Mhmn, pretty simple right?"

"Yeah." She agreed.

"Just keep your eyes up and you're set, wanna go one more time?"

"Sure."

"Want the music this time?"

"Oh yeah!" Sandra nodded, taking out her phone and scrolling down to find the song before hooking it up to the tiny speaker Nora had brought.

They turned back to face one another and began again, much smoother this time. At first, Sandra struggled to keep her eyes off their feet but quickly found herself drowning in foggy blue eyes. Something stirred deep inside her, something she didn't have a name for, something she was unfamiliar with. Not a bad something, no, not bad at all, just maybe a little dangerous. Before she really knew what was happening they had finished dancing, and she was still clinging to Cate. When she realized this she quickly let go of the actress, willing the color in her cheeks to fade, "Thanks." She smiled, trying to collect her thoughts.

Little did they know, when they'd been circling the small room, one of the assistants had popped in to tell them to be on set in half an hour, but upon seeing the scene before her had backed out without a word. Neither of the women had seen her, too submerged in the privacy of the moment.

"You're welcome." Cate flopped back onto the couch, "We still have about twenty minutes until we're on set, wanna watch something?"

"Sure." Sandra smiled, plopping down beside Cate, eliciting a giggle from the younger woman and an even sweeter smile. The brunette had never understood the notion of 'butterflies in your stomach' until this moment. She supposed that when it came to Cate, anything was possible.


	4. Part 4

The fourth time it happened Sandra could hardly remember. They all had the day off the next day and had gone out for drinks with the cast and some of the crew. Sandra wasn't huge on drinking, because she knew once she started she knew she wouldn't stop until she was destined for a killer headache the next day. But she'd tagged along anyway, not wanting to spend the evening alone in her trailer. The first one or two hours were pretty chill, everyone mingled and took a sip from their various cocktails once and a while.

Sandra spent a good forty-five minutes talking to Anne before she'd retired to her own little corner with her phone. Predictably though, it didn't take long for someone to find her, she just didn't think it would be Cate. "What're you doing over here in the corner?" Cate's accent was thick and smooth much like the bourbon she'd consumed throughout the night.

"Oh, just chilling."

Cate stared at her a moment, cherry lips pursing slightly, "Come on Sandy, don't mope over here, come dance." She insisted, reaching down to grab Sandra's hand.

Laughing Sandra shook her head, "I don't dance."

"We both know that's not true." Cate grinned, and Sandra was suddenly grateful for the darkened room so that the pink that was surely spreading up her cheeks wasn't apparent.

She took a sip of her drink and shrugged, "I don't know..."

"Suit yourself." Cate said, "Bartender, can I get another bourbon?" She called over Sandra's shoulder, catching the drink as it slide across the counter.

"Catch ya later Bullock." She sent her air kiss and sauntered off, leaving Sandra longing for the warmth of her hand again.

Sandra watched as Cate and Sarah talked together at the other side of the room, both of them absentmindedly swaying to the beat of the song. A feeling she decided not to investigate started to boil in her stomach as she watched Cate lean over in laughter and touch Sarah's shoulder. She downed the rest of her drink as if she thought it would extinguish the angry fire inside her.

She knew she was being ridiculous, Sarah was in a relationship of over five years and Cate was married for heavens sake. Sandra herself was in a relationship and should not be feeling whatever twisted type of jealously that she was feeling as she gazed at the two blonde women.

This was her own fault, she knew, she was letting Cate get to her. The younger woman didn't mean any harm, it was just the way she was, she drew everyone in. How could she not? She had this beautiful laugh that made you feel all warm inside, and she was absolutely brilliant, she made you feel like you were really living. But she did that to everyone, Sandra wasn't special, she'd let herself indulge in the thought for a while but now it was time to let this delusion go. Filming was almost over and she would have to let this go, whatever this was.

She looked up from her lap and saw Cate staring at her from across the room, and when their gazes met her mouth formed into a smirk. The inner monologue she'd just had vanished, and she felt herself standing. Okay, she would let it go after tonight. She promised herself she would. With that decision made, she started to make her way towards the actress who was still grinning at her.

Sarah had gone to check on Helena, who was lingering by the bar, looking a bit flustered. Cate found her eyes searching the room for Sandra. She hadn't moved from her seat and was currently staring into her empty glass like it was going to tell her the future. Abruptly, Sandra looked up and their eyes found each other, causing a small smile to form on her lips.

Mere seconds later and Sandra was stalking towards her, almost predator-like grin on her lips, that was new. Cate felt something stir in her stomach, something that was definitely due to the amount of drinks she'd had and definitely not the woman looking at her like she was the only person in the room. Frankly it didn't matter what she had told herself as a strong arm wrapped around her, twirling her around with a gasp. "Oh hello there." She grinned, "Thought you didn't dance."

"Changed my mind." She replied, still holding Cate unnecessarily close.

"Good." She hummed, looking up at Sandra...that was new too. Usually it was vice versa, but tonight she had decided to wear flats and Sandra donned a pair of heels, giving her a few extra inches.

The rest of the night slipped into muddled darkness that Sandra couldn't remember the next morning. She remembered Cate's body pressed up against hers, the music blaring louder as the night went on. She remembered the drinks they'd both consumed, Cate's lipstick slowly but surely wearing off on the many glasses. She remembered Cate's eyes, always watching her with such an intensity it'd been staggering. She remembered thinking that if she was single, if Cate was single, if they were both just normal people that nobody knew she might push Cate against the wall and kiss her until neither of them could breathe. That was the last thing she remembered and that frightened her beyond belief.

However, Sandra decided that she trusted herself and was 99% sure nothing had happened between them. That confidence went down considerably as she opened her eyes to see that Cate was sprawled out beside her...and her dress was unzipped. Too many questions ran through Sandra's aching head. Why were they in the same trailer? Forget same trailer, why were they in the same bed? Why couldn't she remember what happened last night? Sandra hadn't blacked out a night in over fifteen years...why now? Panic began to rise in her chest, peaking as she felt Cate shift beside her, mumbling something incoherent. She still had her head buried in a pillow when she groaned softly, "Sandy?"

How did she know where she was? How did she know Sandra was there too? Did she even know Sandra was there? I mean, obviously, she'd just called out her name. Did she remember what happened? If anything happened. Nothing had happened. Had it? No. Absolutely not. The Australian rolled over, colliding with Sandra's side before jolting away in surprise. "Sandra?" She mumbled, struggling to sit up, blonde hair covering her face until an annoyed hand swiped it away.

Sandra scrambled to sit up as well, "You okay?" She asked, her voice still hoarse from sleep.

"Yeah, what happened?" Cate murmured, glancing around her trailer.

"I don't know." She answered honestly, instantly aware of the way Cate's body tensed.

"We must've been really drunk." Cate said, looking back at Sandra, her eyes drifted down her chest, before quickly returning to her face. Sandra glanced down at her chest and realized that her blouse was unbuttoned enough to view her lacy white bra. Shit.

"Oh sorry...I didn't know I..." She stuttered, quickly buttoning her shirt before remembering Cate's similar predicament. "Oh..and your, uh..dress." She said, gesturing for Cate to turn around.

"Thanks..." She murmured, letting Sandra zip up her dress, trying to steel herself against the shiver that begged to run up her spine as soft fingers brushed across her neck.

"So..." They stared at one another, trying to figure out what the next move was, but they didn't have to think long thanks to a soft knock on the door.

"Cate?! Sandra?! You awake?!" Sarah's voice called through the door.

"Yeah! Come on in!" Cate called back without thinking, but when Sarah saw the both of them in the bed she didn't spare them a second glance or look the least bit surprised.

"Glad you kids are finally awake, I brought you some breakfast and ginger tea." Sarah announced, making her way around the trailer as Sandra and Cate stared at her.

"Do you remember what happened last night?" Sarah asked, pouring water into two mugs and placing the tea bags inside.

Cate and Sandra shared nervous looks, "Uh...I mean, well..."

"I'm going to take that as a no." Upon seeing the cautious faces of the two women she laughed, "Oh don't worry you didn't embarrass yourselves too badly, thanks to me. You basically sang a few songs at the top of your lungs and made an absurd amount of bad puns. Oh, and you did some cringe worthy dancing, but you weren't alone there...Anne and Nora were right there with you." She shook her head, smiling, "It was pretty hilarious, but it got late and if either of you had any more alcohol you might've passed out on the floor."

Sarah set the food on the table and then perched on the edge of the bed where the two actresses were sitting. "Helena was the only one sober so she drove us all back. I tried to get you both back to your trailers but you wouldn't let go of Cate and she was like...on the verge of falling asleep leaning against you. I was too tired at that point so I helped you in here and you both immediately crashed."

"Wow..." Cate gaped, "I haven't gotten that stoned for a long time."

"Me either." Sandra agreed, "Thank you Sarah, for not letting us make too big a fools of ourselves."

"No problem, Anne is still asleep and Mindy is laughing with Helena about what we all did last night I'm sure."

"Good thing we have the day off." Cate laughed, then winced at the pain it caused.

"Well, I'll let you two be, I'm gonna go eat."

"Thanks again Sarah." Cate smiled, watching the actress step out of the trailer.

Silence filled the room, Cate eventually scooting herself down the length of the bed before attempting to stand. However, as she did so, an intense throbbing filled her brain and she swayed on her feet, hardly acknowledging the sturdy arm wrapping around her waist. "Whoa, you okay there?" Came a concerned voice, one she knew belonged to Sandra.

"Yeah...just got up too fast, thanks." She murmured.

"Alright." Sandra nodded, cautiously relinquishing her hold on Cate and following her to the booth where the food was waiting.

They ate in silence, absorbed in their own thoughts too much to uphold conversation. Sandra was deathly afraid that somehow this was going to effect their friendship and that because of a few hours she couldn't remember she was going to loose Cate. Unknowingly to her, Cate was having very similar thoughts, eyes frequently glancing up to scan Sandra face for any sign of how she was feeling. Everything inside her was aching, some from the hangover, and others from the deep-rooted fear that she'd done something that she couldn't remember and Sandra did.

They spent the day sleeping off two intense hangovers and wracking their brain for any recollection of the previous night. The next few days after that, they spent tiptoeing around each other, afraid the other was upset but it quickly became clear neither women wanted to be far from the other. It only took about a week for everything between them to fall back into place, and they silently agreed that nothing had happened.


	5. Part 5

They only had a month left of filming when it happened again. There was a concert that night in Central Park and Sandra had asked Cate to go with her. She'd agreed and rushed to her trailer to get ready, a huge relief sagging in her chest that Sandra was reaching out. She and Bryan and broken it off about a week ago and even though she had insisted everything was fine there was a clear change. The cast had agreed it would be best to give her the space to feel her feelings but it was still hard to watch. Sandra came to set, shot the scenes, and went back to her trailer. She hardly said anything to anyone and if she did it was like she was in another world.

Cate wanted to be there for her, whether it was to talk or just sit there for company. She'd almost tripped over herself in her hurry to get changed, returning shortly in a pair of white jeans and a soft white and brown sweater. Sandy was wearing something similar, black leggings and a long dusty rose knitted sweater. "Ready?" She asked, taking a second to register Cate was even there.

"Yup, are we walking?" Sandra raised an eyebrow but didn't comment at how out of breath Cate was, not realizing she'd just run from her trailer.

"I think it would be better because of parking, but I'm not sure I feel safe coming back in the dark."

"Well I have pepper spray and we can call an Uber if you want."

"Yeah, that sounds good."

They agreed and began their journey towards Central Park in silence, observing the darkening city around them. They could hear the music drifting from the center of the park once they got to the entrance, following the sound until they came across the small platform. Cate hadn't asked what kind of concert this was, but if the amount of couples and 'A Sky Full of Stars' playing on stage was any clue...Cate glanced over at her friend in concern, "Sandra are you sure this is...uh..ya know a good idea?"

"Why wouldn't it be?" Sandra snapped, causing Cate to recoil, missing the way Sandra winced at her own words, "I'm sorry..."

"It's okay, I just want to make sure you're alright." She confessed quietly.

"You don't have to protect me Cate." She said, reaching inside her backpack to shake out the picnic blanket she'd brought.

 _Yes, I do. I want to._ "I know."

They silently set up the picnic blanket, under a small willow tree farther away from everyone else. Sandra sat down and pulled out two sandwiches out of the bag, offering one to Cate who was just beginning to sit. She took it without a word, settling a comfortable distance from her friend. They stayed silent for the next forty-five minutes, listening to the mellow music drifting from the stage. It had gotten significantly darker since when they'd arrived, and Cate was glad she'd worn a sweater.

Another ten minutes and the sun had completely set over the park, causing a string of warm white lights flickered on above them. She heard herself gasp as she looked up at the lights that were strung from tree to tree. Those hadn't been there last time she was here, but what a nice touch, it cast a soft glow over the stage and people in the crowd. She stared up at them until her neck began to ache and she had to refocus on the stage, her hand gingerly rubbing the back of her neck.

 _I gotta take a little time, a little time to think things over_

The familiar sway of the drums reached her ears and she looked over at Sandra, only to find her staring, more focused than she had been the entire week...on Cate. Her hand paused their movements on the back of her neck before she quickly turned away and looked back up at the lights. She tried to focus on how they could substitute stars in the light-polluted city and _not_ how they'd danced in Sandra's eyes.

 _I better read between the lines, in case I need it when I'm older_

Sandra had been pulled out of her rather depressing thoughts when a string of Christmas lights illuminated the shadowed park. Her attention shifted again to the woman beside her when the sudden appearance of light elicited a soft gasp from her lips. She was now staring up at them in almost child-like wonder. For the first time in what felt like much longer than a week, she felt like the sadness in her chest had been lifted, if only for a few moments. But then Cate was looking at her, a question too large for Sandra to answer in her blue eyes and then all too quickly she was looking away, taking Sandra's momentary contentment with her.

 _This mountain I must climb, feels like the world is on my shoulders_

The stiff feeling was not only in Cate's neck now, but in her chest too. She felt too many emotions fighting for dominance inside her, making everything tight. Her hand tightened on the picnic blanket and she took a shaky breath. She didn't know what she was feeling, panic the only thing she could recognize beneath the chaos. Closing her eyes she let it all crash over her like a storm ridden wave. Washing over her and then receding, leaving her with a calm sort of clarity _you've fallen for Sandra Bullock._

 _Through the clouds I see sunshine, it keeps me warm as life grows colder_

She kept her eyes closed and let it sink in, she had feelings for Sandra. It didn't come as a surprise if she was being honest. She'd felt something ever since she'd started working with Sandra but had chosen to ignore it until it'd become this throbbing ache inside her. She would have to let go of her, along with any feelings she had for her. She knew that, of course she knew that, even if the realization was like a rock settling in her chest.

 _In my life, there's been heartache and pain, I don't know if I can face it again_

Cate's eyes left the sky and shifted over to Sandra, her chocolate hair almost changing colors in the twinkling lights. Her gaze were trained on the stage again, fingers absentmindedly twiddling with the edge of her sweater. She was silently mouthing the words to the song, and although Cate couldn't really see her expression there was a sort of loneliness floating off her.

 _Can't stop now, I've traveled so far...to change this lonely life_

Cate bit her lip, sadness ebbing in her chest as she watched the woman beside her. She didn't know what to do...she didn't know how she was supposed to comfort her. She didn't even know if she wanted comfort, or if Cate just longed to give it to her. With the recent realization she'd come to, she was going to guess it was the latter. But as she watched Sandra quietly mouth the next verse, she was certain that something inside her was going to snap if she didn't at least try.

 _I wanna know what love is, I want you to show me_

Her hand reached over to lay on top of Sandra's, stilling her movements. "Is this okay?" Cate asked quietly. Sandra didn't look away from the stage or answer, she just repositioned her hand around to grasp Cate's fingers tightly.

 _I wanna feel what love is, I know you can show me_

Cate's breath swelled along with the music, and her teeth bit down even harder onto her lip. Her conscious screamed at her in the back of her head asking her what the ever-loving fuck she was trying accomplish here, but she quickly squashed it out. Willing herself to listen to the music and keep her eyes off Sandra.

The song came to an end and Sandra's hand gave hers a squeeze, making her look over, "Let's go home."

"Okay." She murmured.

They folded up the picnic blanket and made their along the lamp lit path, the music from the concert still drifted through the air. Their bodies brushed as they walked, deciding to blame it on the chilly evening air, "I'm sorry for snapping at you earlier." Sandra said out of the blue.

"What?" She'd almost forgotten about that, "Oh no, you're fine, plus you already apologized."

"I know but...I just wanted you to know that I'm not angry at you. Not at all. I'm just really...confused?"

Cate's brows furrowed, deciding it was probably better not to ask what she was confused about, "I understand, but if you need to talk or help with the kids, or anything..."

"I know, I appreciate that I really do I just...I don't know Cate." She sighed, "I'm just so done with this whole 'love' thing."

"Did you love him?" She asked after a long pause.

"I..I don't know. I thought so, but then I had all these feelings and I really don't know. I'm so confused."

This being the second time she mentioned being confused Cate took a risk, "Confused about what?"

"Everything." Sandra shook her head, "I've always kind of thought, but then recently, but I really don't know at all, maybe I'm just confused? But then I noticed that I was attracted to…had always been, but thought it was normal? But I guess it's not? And I…Cate I think I'm bisexual." She let out a breath like saying it aloud had lifted an unimaginable weight off her chest.

Cate nearly tripped over her own feet, and she had to apply everything she'd learned in all her years of acting to not look utterly shocked. "O..oh...well that's um, how did you know?"

Sandra's eyes were wide and sacred, "That's the problem, I _don't_ know."

"That's okay though, it's okay not to know Sandy." She said, "You'll figure it out eventually."

"I'm sorry, I don't know why I'm such a mess lately."

"Hey, it's okay. In order to sort anything out, you have to be a mess first." Cate's mind was still reeling, from Sandra's confession and her own realization and she found that for once in her life she didn't know what to say. So she said everything, "I just want you to know that I'm here for you Sandra, no matter what and I know that sounds stupid because really we've only just met but it's true. I care about you a lot and even if you don't uh..know...or even value me as that close a friend I just...you're important to me and I yeah..I..." Her anxious rambling coming to an abrupt halt when Sandra's body collided with her own, clinging to her. Cate momentarily forgot how to breathe.

"Thank you." Sandra whispered.

"Oh..." She breathed quietly, posture relaxing as she gently lifted her arms to hold Sandra.

"Of course I value you as a close friend...Cate I..." She stopped, seemingly searching for the right words before landing on, "Trust you."

The last echoes of music could be heard from the square and she felt Sandra swaying in her arms, coincidently causing Cate to move too. She closed her eyes for a moment and let herself indulge in the feeling of Sandra's arms around her. She briefly wondered how many times she could get away with holding Sandra like this before filming ended. But those thoughts brought more depressing ones along with them and she willed her mind to go quiet.

They swayed to the music, hardly even moving, but it was an excuse to stay like this longer than necessary. Despite how much she would've liked to just stay there, the night was getting colder and it wasn't the best plan to be out in the middle of central park at night...not paying attention. "This probably isn't safe." She murmured.

"No probably not." Sandra responded quietly, taking a few more long seconds before untangling herself from Cate's arms.

They began to walk again, but shortly after Sandra reached down and grabbed Cate's hand again, threading their fingers together. Cate really didn't know what to make of any of this, but she sure as hell wasn't going to object to it.

A little farther back on the path, unknown to either Cate or Sandra another couple had begun to make their way back from the concert when they'd stumbled across the pair. "Awe." One of the girls had murmured, "How sweet."

"It's great to see diversity here." The other girl smiled.

"They're probably tourists though, because frankly that's not very safe."

"They seem to have realized that." She giggled as the two women split apart, not sparing a glance backwards to their onlookers. The two girls smiled at each other, before continuing down the path after the two women were out of sight.


	6. Part 6

The last time it happened was during the after party, filming was officially over. The producer had thrown them all a little party in the hotel's lobby before they had to go their separate ways the next day. The whole team was celebrating over a few flutes of champagne and a large assortment of cheeses. They were all sad to part ways but relatively relieved to get back tot their own beds and families.

Sandra tried to be as present as possible, talking to everyone she could see, wishing them safe travels home and thanking them. She told herself it was because she wanted them all to know she really cared, which she did...but she also kept the conversation flowing to remedy the sadness that was aching inside her. It was either talk through the ache or drink through it, and the last time she had alcohol was still too fresh in her mind for her to choose the latter.

Inevitably, the number of people she hadn't talked to dwindled to no one, and she was left lingering near the food, an empty glass between her twitching fingers. The music seemed too loud and she felt herself suffocating, she needed air. She somehow found her way out of the building, the patio acting as a refuge from the rest of the party. She startled as someone spoke from beside her, "Hey, need another?"

Her head snapped over to see the one and only Cate Blanchett. She really shouldn't be surprised at this point. Cate was the one person she hadn't sought out to thank and chat with...in fact she'd been expertly avoiding the blonde all night. But here she was, two flutes in her hands and a silent invitation in her eyes. Sandra sighed and caved in, taking the glasses from Cate's hand, "Thanks."

"Sure." Cate leaned back against the wall beside her, considering Sandra for a moment, "You've been very social tonight."

"Yeah. I just wanted everyone to know how much I loved working with them, I'm sad it's over. They're all really great people." Sandra said, looking straight ahead.

Cate hummed in agreement, "Even though I've been doing this for what feels like forever, it always feels so weird the first week or so after filming stops. I wake up early in anticipation for something that never happens. I keep expecting to see everyone, even though obviously I won't."

"Yeah. I get that. I'm sure you'll be happy to get back to your kids though."

"I have really missed them."

"Mine too, they're growing up so quickly." Sandra nodded.

"It's crazy isn't it? One day they're just little toddlers and the next they're choosing colleges."

"Gosh." Sandra took a sip of her drink, "I can't even imagine."

They stayed together, leaning against the wall for another ten minutes, Cate watched Sandra watch the cars on the highway. In all honesty, Cate had been watching Sandra all night, watched her laugh with their co-stars and hug the assistants, watched her finally run out of people to talk to, watched her retreat to the back of the room. The tug in her chest that had insisted she follow in Sandra's wake the entire night finally overtook her, dragging her across the room and out of the sliding glass door to the brunette.

She had been so filled with energy the entire night but now she looked deflated, leaning against the wall, one arm across her waist the other holding onto the now empty champagne glass. Cate's own glass only had a bit of the bubbly liquid left and she placed it on the table beside her, arms now crossed over her chest. Due to the fact she'd been watching Sandra from the moment she'd arrived, she knew that no matter how subtly...Sandra had been avoiding her. Every time they got close, Sandra would slip away in the other direction, never letting Cate meet her gaze. Even now, when she was right there next to her, Sandra refused to look at her. It made her chest contract in all the wrong ways, until without warning she spit out the question, "Why won't you look at me?" Her voice sounded torn, even to her own ears, she hated it.

She saw Sandra tense slightly beside her, but that was the only inclination that she had even heard Cate. She didn't turn around, she didn't say anything, she didn't even have the decency to shrug. Cate felt anger, along with rejection, rise in her throat like bile. She swallowed the feeling, along with her pride and pushed herself off the wall, "Alright then." She mumbled.

 _Every night that goes between, I feel a little less_

Sandra had been trying to think of something, _anything,_ to say to Cate, but she eventually slipped into her own head, letting herself wallow in her own misery. But then there she was again, her voice, though it was quiet, rang in her ears _'why won't you look at me'_. Sandra squeezed her eyes shut, _because if I do it'll be real, because I'm going to miss you too much, because you're going to have that look in your eyes and I don't know what to say. Because, because, because,_ it didn't matter now.

She could feel the way Cate took the blow beside her, the barely audible submission sounded so dejected it had tears stinging in her eyes. For the past few days she'd felt as though Cate was slipping through her fingers and that she was going to disappear if Sandra didn't hold tight enough. And she was, she was leaving, they all were, but not like this, not like this. "Cate wait." She grasped a thin wrist, and the sadness in her blue eyes threatened to break Sandra's heart, it took all her restraint not to look away again.

"I'm sorry. Don't...don't go."

 _As you slowly go away from me_

"Sandra, what is this? What's going on?" She looked tired.

Her lips tried to form around words but she just couldn't say anything, she watched as Cate's expression went from being exhausted to outright wounded, and she pulled her hand from Sandra's. "Cate." It came out like a sob.

"What?!" The blonde snapped back, "Why won't you just say something? What did I do? What's wrong?" Her voice cracked on the last word.

"I don't know! Okay?! I don't know!" She ran her hands over her face, "God, Cate, I don't know."

 _This is only another test_

"You don't know? Well me either! One minute you're..." She gestured wildly for a moment before realizing that wasn't going to get her point across and continuing, "One minute you're holding my hand and running lines over takeout food, and the next you're acting like my very presence is physically hurting you! You've been acting like this ever since you and Bryan broke up, and don't even try to tell me that's the reason why because you haven't been like this around anyone else! You smile and laugh and I begin to think that maybe everything is okay again, but then I see you later that day and you can't wait to get away from me." Cate's voice was tight, and she had her arms around herself, as if she was trying to protect herself.

 _Every night you do not come, your softness fades away_

Sandra felt like crying, she'd been trying to keep Cate at arms length for the sole purpose of not hurting her but in the end had done just that. She felt like someone who had just yelled at a child, the ugly regret tasted like sewer water, "It's not you."

"No, it clearly is."

"No! It's not! It's me, me and my stupid feelings!"

"Feelings about what Sandra?! Feelings about what?!"

"Feelings about you!" Her next exhale took all the anger from her body and left her with a sad emptiness, "Feelings about you okay?" She slumped back against the wall in defeat, letting her long hair fall in front of her face to hide the tears that were on the brink of spilling down her cheeks.

 _Did I ever really care that much? Is there anything left to say?_

The silence fell like heavy snow, the kind that took more than a sunny day to vanquish. There was no sound for so long that Sandra figured Cate had just left, she wouldn't blame her. But then there was warmth, gently lifting her face and causing those traitorous tears to wobble and then drip down. Cate had a sad smile on her lips when she gently wiped away the teardrops with the pads of her thumbs. "Don't cry, then you'll have raccoon eyes." She murmured.

The emotions hit her like a semi-truck, every repressed feeling and static thought crashing into her at once. Time seemed to slip from the moment when Cate's lips were moving to form an unheard sentence, to the moment when they were closing around Sandra's. She didn't know what had compelled her to do it, and frankly, she didn't care. Couldn't care, as soft lips moved against hers, and just as soft fingers pressed into her cheeks.

 _Every hour of fear I spend_

When Sandra finally pulled back the weight of what she'd done settled in, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that." She began to remove her hands from the place where they'd come to rest on Cate's waist when the other woman's eyes flew back open in panic.

 _My body tries to cry_

"No." She pleaded, pressing their lips together again, bodies colliding like two magnetic forces. It was somehow sweet and desperate at the same time, Sandra could taste the lingering champagne and tart grapes on Cate's tongue, paired with something saltier on her lips. Their kisses retreated back to being chaste, but more frantic than ever.

 _Living through each empty night_

Sandra didn't know when Cate had started mumbling into their kisses, barely audible unless Sandra focused her full attention on it. _I_ their lips crashed _love_ Sandra realized what the salty taste was _you_ she never wanted to let her go.

 _A deadl_ y _calm inside_

 _I love you. I love you. I love you._ Everything breath came with a confession, every kiss with an apology. Until Cate broke away, her head collapsing on Sandra's shoulder with a final, "I love you Sandra."

 _I haven't felt this way I feel, since many a year ago_

They rest there for a moment, until the emotions were humming around them like a livewire, and Sandra couldn't take it anymore. She pulled away gently, taking Cate's face in her hands, forcing Cate to meet her eyes. Blue seemed like such a simple word, so plain...there was no way 'blue' could describe the color of her eyes. There was so much warmth and love in those eyes, so many colors, like a lapse of a thousand sunny days and calm oceans. _God she was being so cliché_ but she couldn't even care.

 _But in those years and the lifetimes past I did not deal with the road_

But they were gloomy like a rainy afternoon now, more grey than blue with a steady flow of tears still dripping down. "Don't cry." Sandra finally said, "You'll have raccoon eyes."

 _And I did not deal with you, I know_

Cate made a sound somewhere between a laugh and a sob, and shortly after she was enveloped by Cate's scent and the warmth of her arms. Sandra's body slumped, and she held Cate as though she was afraid she was going to break her, if she hadn't already. "I love you too." She breathed into Cate's neck.

 _Though the love has always been_

The only response was a soft hum, and Cate's arms tightening around her. The silence left them with only the melancholy Fleetwood Mac song and the muted sounds of the people inside. "Do you still remember how?" Cate asked softly.

 _So I search to find an answer there_

"What?"

"How to dance?"

"I think so."

 _So I can truly win_

She stepped backwards, Cate following as they circled like before. However, unlike last time there was a looseness about it, drifting from step to step instead of moving with a clear purpose. Their posture was a far reach from correct and neither was really watching where they were going, but it didn't matter. Sandra wanted to savor this moment, imprint into her memory forever, the feeling of Cate's body against hers, the warmth of her breath, the way she still, despite everything, moved with a careless grace. When Sandra spun Cate under her arm instead of parting, they just melding back together again.

 _So, I try to say goodbye my friend_

"I'm really going to miss you." Cate said quietly.

"I'm going to miss you too, a lot."

"I'll see you again…for the press tour."

"For the press tour." Sandra echoed.

"I'm sorry, I wish we…I wish…"

"It's okay. I do too." She smiled sadly, "Text me when you get home?"

"Of course. I'm not leaving yet though."

 _I'd like to leave you with something more_

"I know…but you are soon." Her throat tightened and she squeezed her eyes shut quickly to prevent tears from forming again. Honestly, the amount of times she'd had to do that tonight was ridiculous.

 _But I have never been a blue calm sea_

"But not yet." Cate slowed their dance to pull back and look up. "Not yet."

"Not yet." She agreed.

"This won't be our last dance."

"I'll hold you to that."

"I'd expect nothing less."

 _I have always been a storm_

 **A/N I really didn't know about this chapter…at all, but I kept rereading it and didn't know what to change to make me feel better about it so here we are. It's been a ride, I hope you enjoyed it, this is my first chapter fic that I have finished and I'm really proud of myself for following through even if I'm not 100% proud of it. Thank you all!**


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